Lovely Girl   +  reading

Email as Comic Relief

I'm starting to think that perhaps "From the Mail Bag" could become a regular feature on this blog, a bit like 5 Q's. Lately I've been getting a lot of email. Some of it is from editors assigning stories. Some of it is from editors rejecting stories. A lot of it is spam. Then there's the "other" category. Here's a glimpse into what I mean...

Hi Susan,
I'd like to include your article on [X] in my upcoming book. You won't be compensated for your work, but I'd like you to cut the word count in half, sign my release form, and send both items back to me within the next 48 hours. Thanks for your help!
Sincerely,
Slightly Clueless Book Author

Dear Clueless,
Sorry - I'm getting Lasik surgery in 48 hours, so that won't be possible. Plus, I generally get paid for reprints. Thanks for thinking of me, though!
Best,
Busy (and Slightly Blind) Writer

Dear Susan, Since you write a blog geared towards new or expectant mothers, I though you might be interested in... [I didn't bother reading the rest because I was too busy laughing] Signed, [a publicist at a rather large publishing house that we've all heard of but I won't mention here for obvious reasons] I did not respond to this one for (again) obvious reasons.

Too all those who emailed me about guest blogging, of course I wouldn't be catty enough to include you in this category. You're all fabulous, and I'm working on a personal response to all of your emails. In fact, I plan to make February "Guest Blogging" or "Reader Appreciation" Month (haven't decided on that exact wording). Stay tuned!